Verbal Fight Scenes: Anger Patterns in Relationships

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      Parent. Love interest. Best friend. Rival. You main character will react differently to anger depending on the nature of the relationship she is in – and the nature of the other person. Luckily for the writer, within the relationship these reactions are  consistent across time (until one character decides to change).
      Anger patterns are a useful way to further individualize relationships and characters. Why does your character go on the offensive with her father but go silent with her mother and use sarcasm with her brother? Notice that there is an internal pattern to the scenario that I just laid out that can be explained by several different back-stories. Once you know the why of your character's side of several relationships, you will probably have a predictor for how she will automatically react in other relationships.
      What allows this anger pattern to continue? Your character's pattern in the relationship is enabled by the other person (otherwise the relationship probably would have been severed long ago). Person B knows the moves in this dance every bit as well as your character. Even though there is anger, they've (unknowingly) agreed that this is the way to handle it. So when your character finally starts taking responsibility for herself and tries to change this pattern... well. The other character will try to restore the old pattern.
      While verbal fight scenes can happen at any time in a story, of course, but these scenes are especially likely to happen when other character try to prevent your character from changing. Even allies are likely to have verbal fights with your character when your character's change also means a change in their relationship.
      “Change back” can include logic, threats, and actual punishments. These efforts by other characters initially meet with some success as your character backslides. You can see how these attempts can be turned into verbal fights where your character comes out worse of in some way. She can backslide and temporarily gain peace or she can hold fast to her new thought process and risk damaging (or loosing) a relationship.
      I hope this gives you some new ideas and helps you further understand and develop your characters through their relationships with others. Anger can be a useful tool!

Verbal Fight Scenes: 2 Dysfunctional Anger Types

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I am going to introduce the Viper and the Ostrich. These are my (impromptu) names for two opposing anger management styles. It might help you, as you develop your characters, to consider them at two ends of a spectrum of dysfunctional styles. Both feel anger and react to it but accidentally do so in ways that prevent resolution of the deeper problem that they are reacting to. Their behavior patterns beg for you to write verbal fight scenes.

The Viper lashes out at others. Often only a tiny surface piece of the issue is addressed. She has a reason for being angry but because she attacks people, the injustice, imbalance, or threat does not get resolved. After the verbal fight, she may feel bitter or even more determined to solve the problem. Unfortunately, she will probably use the same methods as last time and people will respond in the same way as before. Further, her emotional outbursts can undermine her future attempts (“she's just hysterical”). If only the Viper learned effective anger management, she might actually become a champion for herself and her cause.

The Ostrich hides from her anger until that anger bursts into angry motion. She (and others) sees herself as “nice”. She often denies feeling anger – even to herself – and fights it by trying to bury it in guilt, justifications, and excuses. The “nicer” she acts, the greater the internal pressure of the anger. It builds and builds until it geysers forth – often at inappropriate moments and over minor things. The verbal fight scene often ends with the Ostrich feeling fearful, tearful, hurt, and/or guilty. The opponent often bolsters this reaction. After all, a “nice” person puts others first, sacrifices her own needs to meet the needs of others, right? The Ostrich often has tremendous empathy and compassion for others. If only she learned effective anger management, she could channel these strengths while meeting both her needs and the needs of those around her.

The Viper and the Ostrich provide just one spectrum of dysfunctional anger management for you to explore. Knowing different dysfunctional styles of anger management is important since these types allow for more conflict, greater character growth, and more nuanced characters. Good places to get ideas for anger management types are books,articles, and videos on fixing these problems. To create characters with room to grow, just take the self-help book's ideal, then flip it backwards and turn it inside out.

 

Verbal Fight Scenes: Stages of the Fight Scene

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      Verbal fight scenes can be enhanced by the view-point character's anger (short-term, of course, but often also long-term anger), her anger management style, and the anger patterns in that relationship. Anger is an emotional reaction to a problem. In earlier posts, we looked at many situations and issues that can trigger anger. In this post, we look at a common expression of anger – the verbal fight scene. Remember that as with any scene, a verbal fight scene needs an inciting incident, a complication, a climax, and (usually) a resolution.
      Verbal fight scenes are often a character's attempt to fix the problem that she is angry about. Maybe a buried resentment is brought to the surface through another character's actions (words are a type of action). You should decide whether you want to tap into a flash-pan of short-term anger or flame the banked embers of long-term anger. Both can allow you to develop your character. I happen to like to bring long-term issues to the surface because it is one way to introduce or develop backstory,character development, environment,and backstory (see posts from earlier this month).
      Luckily for the writer, there are many ways the character can go wrong. Venting, blaming, and sarcasm are just a few unproductive ways a character may express anger during a fight scene. Unfortunately for the character, poor anger management practices tend to either make the problem worse or keep the situation the same as before. This might be because the opponent withdraws, retaliates, or dismisses the viewpoint character (To name just three possible reactions.) One technique to make the complication more effective, you can have the antagonist trigger your viewpoint character's flaw, prejudice, or backstory wound.
      Such a scenario is almost certain cause the climax and a bad outcome for your viewpoint character – especially in the first half of the story when she is primarily reactive rather than proactive.

Anger and Growth: Secondary Character Arcs

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If you want, your character can become a catalyst of change for other characters. When your protagonist acts to change, the characters closest to her will react (if they react like real people, that is). Since your character is in many types of relationships, you might want to show your readers how the main character's choices instigate positive (or negative) change in another character.

Introduction. So long as your character acts “normal” (meaning she hasn't tried to change yet), your secondary characters will know how to treat your main character, will know what to expect from your main character, and will know where he stands with your main character. Some of them may have insights to your protagonist, some of them may contribute to your main character's problems, some of them may be her unwelcome champions.

Early Middle. Suddenly, our main character has started to act different. Suddenly, your secondary characters don't know where they stand with her, how this will affect their relationship with her, if she will change her mind about them. They feel threatened, wronged, uncertain. They get angry. They want to regain their equilibrium. They try to bring back the person they once knew through resistance and counter-moves. The closer the person is to your main character, the harder she will try to restore “normal”. A smart, self-aware, or empathetic secondary character might try to see things her way as a means of restoring the balance.

Late Middle. The main character is now proactive instead of reactive. People close to the main character feel even more scared, threatened, or off-balance. Anger escalates. Stakes are raised. They might threaten to (or actually) reject the main character or impose other punishments. But the main character is growing stronger. Your main character becomes truly clear about what she wants and what she stands for. This could cause secondary characters to be more clear about what they want and where they stand. This could inspire a savvy secondary character. An alert secondary character might question the way others are treating your main character now that she is standing up for herself. A dissatisfied secondary character might be inspired to make changes of his own.

Climax. Write your own climax and resolution for the secondary characters and your main character. Are the choices painful? Inspiring? Consider how this adds to the deeper meaning of your story.

Making your main character into a catalyst for change gives her added depth, power, and significance. Showing how your main character affects the people around her adds realism, meaning, and complexity. Showing intertwined emotional journeys also can reinforce the deep message of your story about human nature, human condition, right and wrong, or whatever issue you have chosen to address.

 

Anger and Growth: Protagonist Character Arc

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We've established that anger is an emotion that sends the message to the writer that “something is wrong” in the life of the character. When that “something” stunts our character's competence, self-expression, or personal growth then we have the makings of a character arc. Here is one example of an arc for a protagonist. Notice that it closely follows the pattern of an external plot arc.

Introduction. Your character is in stasis. She may or may not be happy with the way things are going but she is not actively trying to change (any seeming attempts to change are self-sabotaging). As the Introduction progresses, more and more pressure comes to bear on her but she resists change and/or remains ignorant of the issue that underlies her anger.

Turning Point 1. Whether you place this before, after, or with the outer turning point is partially dependent on your genre and partially dependent on personal choice. At the first inner turning point, she recognizes (or thinks she recognizes) that she needs to change herself that her anger points to and she decides (reluctantly or willingly) to change it.

Early Body. During this time in your book, your main character is reactive. She likely doesn't really understand her flaw and its underlying issues. She blames, denies, avoids, and goes down false roads. She'll take her anger out on others.

Turning Point 2. She comes face-to-face with her role in her problems, including the effects of lashing out at others.

Late Body. During this time in your book, your main character becomes proactive. She learns about the underlying causes of her problem. As she changes, other people resist her change and try to make her change back. Often they threaten/enact consequences if she continues to change. At the same time, she learns to take responsibility for her reactions to her feelings.

Turning Point 3. She comes face-to-face with the potential consequences of not changing. This renews her determination to change.

Climax. The changes she has made (and lessons she has learned along the way about herself, the antagonist, and others) plays into the plot resolution.

If this emotional arc does not resonate with you, no worries. Character arcs develop much like plot arcs. So if you are someone who plots, you can take your action plot arc and make a second plot arc for inner growth. Pansters who have written the3eir book but forgotten a character arc can do the same. If you are a panster who is still writing your book, just remember that each emotional turning point happens near or at the plot turning points.

Again, whether your inner turning point happens before, after, or during your outer turning point is dependent on your own preferences and situation.

Understand Anger: World Building

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Character anger can tell you a great deal about her relationship with her world – particularly the traditions and values of the group she is presently immersed in. When anger is used to deepen world development, it is important to remember that your character probably won't feel that there is threat/ injustice, etc, unless she has first been exposed to ideas that run contrary to the traditions and values of the group to which she is reacting.

Tradition. Anger at tradition may occur because your character feels her growth is stifled. This is especially common with young characters. When a character rebels against tradition (deepening character), that act either implies or highlights the tradition that is being rebelled against (deepening the world) and also shows how others react to the act of rebellion (deepening relationships).

Values. Anger at society values may occur because your character feels the values are unfair. This is especially common when your character is part of some sort of minority (character development). As with tradition, anger at social values can be used to deepen character, world, and relationships. In addition, the your character will often choose to counter the rejected values with a different set of values! This new set of values may

Peer pressure. Any time your character tries to deviate from social norms, there will be pressure to change back. Anger can prompt your character to say “no” to others' beliefs and “yes” to her own truth. Group pressure, of course, can take the form of family or any other group that is considered “like” the character. The crucial elements are 1) that the character feels a part of the group that is trying to affect her behavior and 2) that the character struggles to separate herself from the group (sometimes while staying a part of the group).

Belonging/ Independence. People are strange characters. We feel threatened by too much of “together” and by too much “alone”. Your character just might become angry when she feels excluded from or claimed by a group. Personal space is violated in some way.

Gender roles. These are firmly entrenched into society. Entrenched gender roles can be especially aggravating for your character when she feels like her personal growth is stifled by the expectations, like her rights are being violated, or like her needs are unable to be met.

Relationship roles. In the context of world building, I am referring not to individual relationships but “elder generation and younger generation”, “powerful position and powerless position”, “older sister and younger brother”, “married woman and unmarried woman”. Social roles and status and how they interact. Relationship roles might become an anger issue for your character when she feels she must interact with someone based on her relationship role with him even though he has not fulfilled the responsibilities of his role. For instance, filial respect for an abusive father who does not provide for his family. In this example, we develop the world, the backstory, the relationship, and possibly the backstory wound.

Anger at entrenched traditions and values does not necessarily mean that your story will become Character Versus Society. But I hope that you can see how scenes that contain this element can deepen reader (and character) understanding of the world where she lives. Knowing the traditions and values of your main character's Ordinary World of the Beginning can help you make the world of the Middle more strange to your character. It can add a subplot. It can let you further develop your antagonist – even provide the primary motive! And it can make both your character and your reader question her assumptions.

Understand Anger: Character development

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Understanding character anger can help you develop your character. Now, I'm not suggesting that you should make an angry character (or that you shouldn't). But what makes your character angry can give you insight into that character's present situation, backstory, current wound/flaw/weakness, and other character traits. (Developing relationships and character arcs are discussions for another day!) Anger, again, indicates that something is wrong in your character's life and a change is needed

Backstory. Your character's life prior to the start of the story is sure to (or should) include moments of injustice, unmet wants or needs, even threats to her emotional or physical well-being. These events don't need to be traumatic so long as they have a lasting effect on your character.

Character flaw or wound. Your character's flaw is typically rooted in the backstory. Because your character's flaw makes her reactive, you can work backwards to discover the nature of the flaw. What makes her angry? Why? Maybe she gets angry at "neglectful" parents or people's disinterest in homeless vets. Guess what happened the the character (or someone important to her) before the start of the story?

Other traits. On the same vein, what if racist talk makes her angry, or people who believe a particular stereotype, or people who drink excessively? This says something about her beliefs, her upbringing, the people she will respond to (positively and negatively), and maybe even her current lifestyle.

Then there's how your character expresses (or doesn't express) her anger... But that will be addressed later this month!

Understand Anger: Uncover Character Motives and Story Goals

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For our purposes this month, anger is a signal that something is wrong in the character's life. That “something is wrong” means something needs to change. Discover what needs to change and you find internal conflict, external conflict, and maybe even your story goal. Ideally, there are several reasons that your character feels angry over a certain action, behavior, thought, etc.

Inner conflict. Suppose your character feels that a need or want is not being met in one or more relationships. But addressing the problem would disrupt – perhaps even end – the valued relationship. Or maybe the conflict comes from how she sees herself (or her concern for how others see her). Feeling angry might threaten that image. Also scary/ worrisome to the character! Then there's the situation where she knows why she is angry but changing the problem means changing herself (become more assertive, for instance). There are so many reasons a character may want and not want to make the change needed to resolve the source of her anger. Voila! Inner conflict!

Motives. Since your character feels inner conflict, you now have motive to approach, avoid, block, and resist forward movement – both in external plot and internal plot.

Story Goals. Often in the beginning of the story, the character doesn't understand the reasons she reacts angrily to certain situations. At the start of the story, she's in a developmental stasis. Ineffective, unfocused anger or frustration can be a great way to point the reader to the problem. As pressure increases on the character, anger is one of her natural reactions. At the first emotional turning pint, the character not only knows that there is a problems, she commits to fixing that problem (either reluctantly or eagerly). Anger can be the catalyst to making the resolution to change.

Exploiting Anger for Story Development

How do you think of anger? Society tends to depict it as something to be avoided but can any emotion really be avoided? We can suppress it, channel it, express it, learn from it... This month focuses on learning from character anger. We'll look at how to exploit long-term issues in the next two weeks (for character development, world development ,as well as character development arcs). In the third week, we'll look at short-term issues (and mid/long-term issues) in the form of verbal fight scenes. And we'll wrap up with some advanced techniques and philosophical considerations.

For our purposes this month, anger is a signal that something is wrong in the character's life. It could be a relationship imbalance, an injustice, a smothering, an unmet emotional issue, an unmet need, an imbalance in separateness and togetherness, just to name the tip of the ice burg. “something is wrong” means something needs to change. For a writer, this is the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

That anger comes in many hues is a plus for the writer. There are many books on anger management. Books about intimate relationships, about anger types, about anger and spirituality, about anger management in general. What the writer wants is to read and reverse this advice. A character who can perfectly manage her anger from the beginning of the book is probably a boring character. A character who understands the reasons behind her anger at the beginning of the book may be a character well on the way to change ( later we''ll get into reasons why she still might not act to change)

At the most fundamental level, anger is an emotion. It happens instinctively (not under our conscious control), in response to something in our internal or external environments. Whether you plan what sets off your character or you are surprised by a character's reaction, you can learn a lot from it. About the current character, past character, future character, her relationships, the world she is in, and more!

To: Readers (From: Writers)

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A reader of this blog made the comment that just as writing tethers the writer to other people, writing also tethers other people to the author. It works both ways. I've been thinking about this and decided to form my thoughts into two blogs: what writers give readers and what readers give writers. Today: what writers give to readers.

• Entertain: A writer entertains the reader. This is probably the most common reason for reading fiction: to be entertained. Entertainment is not all laughs – tears and fears make the happy times all the more meaningful.
• Educate: A writer educates the reader. Yes, there may be facts about how the material world works but there are always facts (or opinions) about the workings of people and life. As an Aspergers person, I turned to books to learn what did not come intuitively to me.
• Validate: A writer validates the reader. Readers are often drawn to writers who share similar world-views – who have similar thoughts about the way the world does (or should) work. Through this world-view, the writer can affirm the reader's feelings about struggles, joys, and conflicts. The reader finds personal affirmation in the written page.
• Feel: Definitely the writer gives a reader feelings. Every poem, book, lyric, and script is saturated in emotion. Having characters feel is not enough. The reader has a need to feel, too. And the source of feeling – just like in the real world – is in caring.
• Challenge: A writer challenges the reader. Throughout a book, the writer poses a series of questions that the reader tries to answer. A writer may also pose dilemmas about society, love, and other aspects of life. Sometimes the writer provides an answer but other times the reader is challenged to reach the reader's own conclusions.
• Create: A writer gives the reader the power to create a world that belongs just to the reader. A world that exists only inside the page(s) of the work. Some readers go further and create fan fiction, using the characters and world that the writer introduces. And some readers go even further, inspired by other writers they create their own worlds and characters. Both types write for themselves and for a new generation of readers.

To: Writers (From Readers)

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A reader of this blog made the comment that just as writing tethers the writer to other people, writing also tethers other people to the author. It works both ways. I've been thinking about this and decided to form my thoughts into two blogs: what writers give readers and what readers give writers. Today: what readers give writers of any kind.

• Entertain: Yes, readers entertain writers. We love to design adventures for others to enjoy. Almost nothing is more fun than a reader in tears of sadness or laughter. Or a reader who is sleep-deprived because they couldn't put our book down.
• Educate: Having readers encourages writers to educate themselves. We learn more about the world so we can more accurately represent it in our books. We learn about nature, cities, the legal system, and people (just to name a few). We learn how to convey our ideas more clearly.
• Feel: Readers encourage writers to feel. Yes, the path to publication and growing readership is strewn with all kinds of emotions. But every writer is encouraged to feel and think about how feelings work so the reader can have a more intense and vicarious experience.
• Challenge: Readers definitely challenge the writer. Reach more people. Become more skilled in the craft. Invent new ways to surprise and delight. Produce new material. Keep the reader engaged. Lead the reader where you want the reader to go. So many challenges!
• Empower: The reader empowers the writer. Every time a book is read, a writer becomes someone who matters. Because of readers, a writer can become an agent of change, a therapist, a philosopher, a giver of escape, a maker of opportunities. And readers validate the writer's efforts and existence.
• Create: Readers give writers a reason to create. Yes, we would write anyway. But having readers means being subject to expectations and most people try a little harder when there are expectations to fulfill. Writers write a little better when there is someone to impress. Writers write a little faster or more often when someone is waiting to read the next installment.